Reflection on today's scripture - 10/02/2025

See, blog post Matthew 18:1-5, 10

I typically begin my days by listening to scripture through the Pray as you Go app. It's usually a morning routine, but sometimes I listen while walking or commuting to work. I adopted this habit years ago after a friend suggested it. I use other apps for different purposes, but this one helps me start my day. It always begins with music, followed by the scripture of the day, which is read twice. The reader asks a question, allowing time for reflection. However, the reflection time often feels insufficient, so I occasionally pause it to see if anything significant comes to mind.

Today's reading brought back memories of a more innocent time. Since retiring from my 35-year career, I've felt childlike and humbled. Releasing the stress and daily job worries allowed memories from my past to flood back. Balancing a high-pressure job and being a working mom was challenging. I tried to be everything to everyone while maintaining my relationship with God. My belief was childlike, but my mind was cluttered with concerns about colleagues and responsibilities, knowing my family should come first. I did my best to balance it all, sacrificing self-care for others, and emerged from the battle retired and grateful, but not without scars.

Now in retirement, I seek that relationship with more clarity. As a child, I prayed nightly for everyone in my life. The list was long because I was blessed with two loving parents, many siblings (10), both sets of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and wonderful cousins. My nightly prayer began with, "Dear Lord, bless my mom, my dad, all my siblings, my grandparents, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, and all my friends." It was a ritual until adolescence brought chaos and my focus shifted to a boyfriend I dated in high school and married after college. Though he's long gone, the baggage remains and still haunts me. I long for the wonder, joy, and faith of my childhood.

The good news is that feeling has fully returned in retirement. It was always a glimmer, but now it's a shining star. My relationship with the Lord grows daily. I'm excited to start each day, praying more, being mindful of my intentions, and striving to be humble and non-judgmental. It's challenging with so much heartache and tragedy in the world, but I focus on the Lord and become a child again—not childish, but childlike in the joy the Lord brings, even in darkness.

I would love to hear how this scripture moved you. There's always more to write, but since this is a reflection, I'll leave it here.

.

Peace be with you! Mo Rae

Note: MoRae is a nickname given to me by one of my sisters and later adopted by my daughter during her teenage years. Monique is my actual name, with Rae as my middle name, inherited from my maternal grandfather. Although I have primarily been called Mimi, the names MoRae and Monique have become more common in recent times.